DEAR DEIDRE: ALTHOUGH I have always enjoyed sex, my partner has never been interested in it. As far as I know, he does not masturbate.
I am 46 and have been with my partner, 54, for four years.
If I instigate sex, he makes excuses. Often he blames me, saying I have bad breath or that I have put on weight so he doesn’t find me attractive.
Sometimes he just says he is too tired.
Our relationship is good otherwise but I feel resentful and frustrated.
I just want to be loved properly.
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DEIDRE SAYS: He has never showed interest in sex, so he probably thought that was acceptable to you – but maybe you expected that would change.
Tell him you have found you cannot be happy without physical affection. Say you understand he can’t help the way he feels now but, you would like him to get help.
My e-leaflet How Sex Therapy Helps explains.
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