DEAR DEIDRE: MY lover swears on his son’s life that he and his wife have separate bedrooms and live like brother and sister, but I am not sure if he is telling me the whole truth.
We met on a dating site six months ago. I’m 36 and divorced. My lover is 38 and has a son who’s six.
My married lover says his wife’s more like a sister but I always come last for him[/caption]
I see my lover twice a week, mostly on his terms.
He is a very kind man and he understands it is not easy for me being in this situation but says his son comes first.
I do get that but I am growing so fond of him. He did say from the start that he can’t offer me a lot of things that someone else could.
It is hard. I find myself torn between staying or going. Is he telling me the truth?
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DEIDRE SAYS: I bet his wife doesn’t see their relationship as brother and sister.
If your lover can have his cake and eat it, then there is no incentive for him to commit to you – and you’re going to feel more and more used.
I’d say end this affair and focus on boosting your social life.
Give yourself a chance to meet someone new who will appreciate you full time. My e-leaflet Your Lover Not Free will help you decide.
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