DO you remember the morning of June 24, 2016? A lovely morning. We had just voted to leave the European Union.
And amid all the euphoria, I remember saying to my wife: “They won’t let it happen. Somehow, they’ll stop it.” I don’t think I was alone in reckoning that.
It’s looking very much like that at the moment, isn’t it? We’re 43 days away from deadline time, March 29. But what do you reckon the likelihood is of the deadline being put back? I’ll bet it is.
Olly Robbins thinks it’s likely. He’s a civil servant and the Prime Minister’s chief negotiator to the EU. He was overheard jabbering about the whole business in a bar in Brussels. And he said if there WERE a delay, it would most likely be a long one.
We’ll probably all be here this time next year, then, in exactly the same position.
By which time the deal will be so watered down, the whole point will have been lost. It’s pretty close to that stage right now.
Why has this happened? Because our establishment do not want us to leave. And while they may pay lip service to “respecting the voice of the people”, they don’t remotely mean it. They never did.
And so, on the one hand we have establishment voices — Blair, Mandelson, Heseltine — and a growing number of current politicians demanding we must have another vote. Because we got it wrong last time.
The European Union has a history of ignoring popular votes and getting countries to run the vote again, after a slew of propaganda about why the people were so wrong.
Establishment has a scant respect for democracy
Then, on the other hand, we have a Prime Minister who voted Remain leading our negotiations. And at every stage of the process more and more has been given away.
We started from a position of weakness by allowing the EU to dictate the order of the negotiations. So they got to demand things from us — such as extortionate amounts of money — before we even got down to talking about our trading relationship.
And at every stage the deal has got weaker. Every time she came back from Brussels, something more had been given away. Until we reach today’s position, where the deal before us isn’t really leaving the EU at all.
We’ll still be tied to the customs union for the foreseeable future. We will still have the horrible European Court of Justice telling us what we can and can’t do for another two years.
And there are plenty of people who believe that the famous issue of the Northern Ireland backstop is simply an attempt to get us to remain, for ever, inside the customs union.
Here’s what I think will happen.
Brexit will, in the end, be delayed. And by the time a deal is put before us again — months down the line — it will bear no real resemblance to “leaving the European Union”.
And so those of us who have no trust in our liberal establishment, because we know what scant respect it has for democracy, will be able to say: “Told you so. They were never going to let it happen.”
Bully for Mike
Congratulations to young Hartlepool lad Michael Rice for becoming our entrant in the Eurovision Song Contest.
He’s singing a ditty called Love Is Really Lovely or something, and will come third from last, just above Kosovo and France.
Michael Rice will represent the UK at Eurovision but will probably come third from lastBut bless him, at least he’ll be going.
Far left, anti-Semitic bullies have been demanding we boycott the extravaganza because it’s in Israel.
A bunch of C-list celebs wrote a letter (to The Guardian, natch) insisting we pull out.
They said nothing when the contest was held in the repressive Islamic state of Azerbaijan.
Good luck, Michael. And enjoy lovely Tel Aviv.
Leave it out BBC
In future, eight per cent of people in BBC programmes must be gay.
That’s a new target the corporation has set itself.
The BBC is trying to represent the country with gay quotas but perhaps they could do better with BrexitYes, I know what you’re thinking. The current number is somewhere in the region of 72 per cent.
But still, this is just the BBC trying hard to represent the country as it is, and we shouldn’t complain.
In fact, here’s a few more areas where they might try to better represent the country as it is.
Pro-Brexit people on political programmes.
A majority voted to leave. But remainers outnumber leavers on Question Time and Any Questions by two to one, according to a report by the Institute for Economic Affairs.
So how about it, BBC? More leavers on air please – and they can be as camp as a row of tents for all I care.
Sort out trophy hunters
A beautiful – and very rare – African black leopard has just been caught on film in Kenya.
They haven’t been photographed for more than 100 years.
It’s time to stop trophy hunters from bagging rare wild animalsIf I were the leopard, I’d keep my head down a bit.
Some smirking gimp from Butthole, Texas, will be out with a gun trying to blow its brains out. In the past week there have been two more horrible, distressing photos of American big-game hunters standing over some poor animal they’ve just shot.
One scumbag was looking proud as punch having murdered a baby elephant. Another one shot an extremely rare horned goat. It’s time we sorted these people out.
Valentine's day blues
I know what my wife is getting me for Valentine’s Day. I’ve seen it. It’s a bloody exercise bike.
It’ll probably come with a sweet little Valentine verse:
Roses are red, violets are blue
Lose a few stone and you might get a . . .
One year my dad bought my mum an iron for Valentine’s Day.
She didn’t speak to him for days
Tussle with Tusk
So, the smirking Pole Donald Tusk wonders what the special place reserved in Hell will look like for British Brexiteers.
Donald Tusk was rebutted by the Greek finance minster attacking the monetary unionA great response to this puffed-up EU goblin from former Greek finance minister Yanis Varoufakis. He said: “Probably very similar to the place reserved for those who designed a monetary union without a proper banking union.
“And when the financial crisis hit, cynically transferred the bankers’ gigantic losses on to the shoulders of the weakest taxpayers.”
Katie Price fail
I see Katie Price was paid to turn up to dance at some gig. But there were no punters. Nobody interested. I think that lass is going to have to reinvent herself again.
I suppose it’s sad to see someone slip out of the public eye when they are so desperate to be in it. Although I don’t care THAT much, to be honest.
Apparently, people are their most happy when they’re 16 years old – and 70.
That’s according to a new study. I can see that.
At 16 you think you know everything. And you’re dumb enough to think that you’ve got all those years to change the world and make it a nicer place. And that’s exciting.
While at 70, you pretty much DO know everything. And it’s too late to do anything about it. And that’s relaxing.
A blonde moment
Got to agree with my mate Ally Ross. Has there been a more stupid series in the history of television than Icons?
Marylin Monroe would have topped the the current subjects of the TV series IconMuch as I admire Tanni Grey-Thompson, Virginia Woolf and so on, in what possible way are they more iconic figures than Marilyn Monroe? Or Churchill? Or for that matter, Hitler?
Most read in opinon
The 20th century wasn’t very nice – and so it would have been entirely fitting if Adolf had fought out the final with Uncle Joe Stalin, much as he did in 1941. But as ever, the Beeb made a bad idea even worse through political correctness.
And no Beatles. Computer genius Alan Turing won. In the end it’s a surprise the title didn’t go to Clare Balding.